Key West: Somewhere South of Normal
Lately new friends from the real world (loosely defined as everywhere outside Key West) have been asking me what the island city is REALLY like. After all, it’s been my beloved home for 30 years, so they figure I must know.
The first thing I tell them is simple: Key West is not normal.

In Key West, you might spot dogs riding in bike baskets and cats wearing video cameras. Normal? Not exactly.
In a normal city, locals don’t head for the nearest laundromat when they crave a great sandwich. They don’t drive around in cars painted like flamingoes or giant chile peppers or mobile coral reefs. They don’t wear tiaras to lunch.
In fact, Key West is gloriously, outrageously abnormal — a place where wild chickens roam the streets and dogs are favored customers at more than one bar. A place where nobody thinks it’s strange to spot a man painted entirely silver pedaling down the street on an equally silver bike (actually, he’s a local icon, but that’s another story).
What else should “outlanders” know about the island city?

Wandering pirates, old-timers say, were among Key West's early settlers -- and some can still be spotted.
EVERYBODY GETS ALONG. Key West has a warm, welcoming atmosphere that probably stems from its patchwork heritage. Early settlers included Cuban cigarmakers, New England shipbuilders, Bahamian salvagers, Navy men, southern merchants, and even a few wandering pirates. The current population ranges from recovering hippies to people fleeing the “real world” (see above) and émigrés from virtually all over the world. Despite their outward differences, they generally get along just fine.
NO PANTYHOSE. Though parts of the island resemble a New England fishing village, with its gingerbread-trimmed Victorian houses and tidy picket fences, the laid-back atmosphere bespeaks its Caribbean roots. Businessmen don’t wear socks in Key West — let alone ties — and some don’t even wear shoes. The typical island woman shudders at the thought of struggling into pantyhose.
BASKET HOUNDS ABOUND. Bicycles and scooters are favored modes of transportation through the streets of Old Town. And why not? Summer or winter, the breeze is likely to carry the spicy scent of seaweed, saltwater, and frangipani blossoms — something that can’t be enjoyed from a closed car. It’s not unusual to see a bicyclist ride by with a parrot on his or her shoulder, or a dog in the bike basket. These are called basket hounds — a breed believed to be indigenous to Key West.

Each year during Hemingway Days, "ernest" competitors vie for the Hemingway look-alike title. Normal? Maybe not ... but a whole lot of fun! (Photo by Andy Newman/Florida Keys News Bureau)
CREATIVITY RULES. Key West’s creative heritage is a definite part of its charm. Known as a haven and inspiration for writers since Ernest Hemingway’s ten-year residence in the 1930s, the island is home to scores of published writers — including several Pulitzer Prize winners. An annual literary seminar, a Hemingway Days celebration, writers’ groups and a world-class local bookstore all testify to the island’s affection for authors.
THE WORLD’S LONGEST STREET. Many of the most interesting art galleries, shops and restaurants can be found on Duval Street, Key West’s fabled main street. Stretching from the Gulf of Mexico to the Atlantic Ocean, Duval has been called “the longest street in the world.” People who stroll the street can find everything from garden sculptures to sundresses to sinfully good tropical drinks in its colorful establishments.

Being a treasure hunter -- like the late icon Mel Fisher -- is regarded as a perfectly "normal" occupation in Key West. (Photo courtesy of Mel Fisher's Treasures)
OCCUPATIONAL HAZARDS? NOT LIKELY! In Key West, it’s perfectly acceptable to state your occupation as “treasure hunter,” “poet,” “drag queen,” “street performer” or all of the above — without eliciting laughter, a disbelieving stare, or even raised eyebrows. I can’t think of any other place in the world where that’s true.
No, Key West is NOT normal. A bastion of lovely lunacy, it’s separated from mainland Florida by 42 bridges, more than 100 miles … and an attitudinal shift that must be experienced to be truly understood.
So what’s the best thing to tell curious real-world friends about Key West? To head south to the offbeat island, of course, and discover it for themselves!

